I spend a lot of time presenting to parents or answering questions during summer camp and other high school programs. Questions are typically posed by the parents, but if students are present I address my responses to the student. Below are some of my standard responses…with a few bonus notes for parents at the bottom.

1. No don’t drop athletics to take more AP classes. Keep doing your team sport! Team sports provide WAY more benefits than adding more and more AP classes. (Note: you can apply this to band or any extracurricular activity that takes time, creates a team spirit, and allows you to experience wins, losses, hard work and fun.)
2. No don’t take every AP class you can take. It’s not necessary. Take AP in the classes you enjoy and don’t in those that are not your favorite or strongest. Sometimes the class rank and GPA game is not worth it (ok probably most of the time it’s not worth the stress and time).
3. Don’t play the admissions game and try to game the system with work or volunteering or school or whatever this summer. Do what makes sense for you. Do what you enjoy.
4. Apply to lots of places if you are able. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. There are great schools all across Texas (or wherever). Don’t limit yourself. Find the school that fits YOU.
5. Pay attention to the student services offered at schools. Make sure they support students in lots of different ways (career services, tutoring, living learning communities, etc).
6. Explore where graduates go to work. What companies come to recruit at the university. Do graduates end up in places and spaces you’re interested in landing upon graduation? If not, be prepared to work harder on your own to get where you want to go.
7. Just cuz you are top of your class doesn’t mean you get into the major of your choice at UT Austin. Don’t slack on your application. All parts of it matter.
8. Look at degree plans and the classes you will take. It can help you figure out what sounds interesting and might be a good fit for a major. And all majors are not the same across universities. Do your research.
9. Don’t make yourself crazy in high school. It’s high school!! Have fun along the way. The whole college thing, assuming that’s the best choice for you, will work out if you are open minded and don’t get to caught up in one specific pathway. Success for everyone is different and there are many pathways to get there.

Some side notes for parents:

• “We” should not be part of your language. Your student should send the emails, sign up for the campus visits, register for the SAT and ACT, and complete their own college application. “We” are not going to college. Your student is.
• Don’t just show up at a college expecting to visit with faculty, students, staff. It may not work that way. Be sure to check out their website first and have your student sign up for tours, meetings and whatever else may be available. Most programs and advising centers have limited staff and don’t have the capacity to handle walk-in visitors. It’s not because they don’t want to…they just don’t have enough time in their day to typically do it.
• How it worked for you and what was best for you may likely not be the same for your student. Times change. Processes change. And people are completely different. Guide and support your student and catch yourself if it becomes more about you and what you want and what you liked and less about your student.

Note: most of the families and students I interact with are college bound. Remember: college is NOT the best choice for all students.

As my oldest son heads into senior year of high school, I’ll write more on the high school experience, college exploration process, and admissions adventure as time goes on and the craziness inspires my writing. Until then, take a deep breath and relax. It’s just high school!